I was gonna MEGA RAGE!!!! But then I realised I’d be using up my only three good ideas on one post and that would be FOOLISH!!!! Especially since I need to get ahead of the game for my loyal reader.
That is if you are still there….
Are you still there….
Please still be there….
Let’s move on….
Or possibly I should move on….
Or you should move on….
Or maybe no one should move on….
I just don’t know anymore….
The following announcement assumes that your country of origin drives on the left. If your country of origin drives on the right then you need to swap left with right and right with left. There is no change to up or down unless they involve left and right then you will probably need to learn about vector spaces.
DO YOU DRIVE?
Let’s go over some of the basics. On the road they have signs. There are stop signs, give way signs, caution signs and the list goes on…. These signs give you information. For example, the speed limit sign. A simple sign that tells you how fast you can go. Where I live if there is no sign you can go 50km per hour. If there is a sign with a 70 inside a red circle you can go 70km per hour. The intent of these signs is to keep traffic flowing at a reasonable pace, within the design limits of the road. Going slower will disrupt the flow of traffic and can make the road be less safe due to the interaction of the faster and slower cars. So if you are in a 70 zone, like on St Georges Rd then go 70….
….NOT FUCKING 50!!!!
YOU FUCKING SHIT ME OFF TO NO END!!!!
Before when I mentioned the design of the road. Well engineers are FUCKING CONSERVATIVE. That is, they err on the side of caution when it comes to safety for the benefit of everyone. Ever driven around a bend that had a yellow warning sign advising that you should do a certain speed but that you could actually go faster?
That’s cause it’s a conservative setting taking into account the lower end of driving capability.
Ever wonder why the cross walk signals takes so long?
That’s cause it is set to let really old people and the disabled to cross safely.
So engineers (and they are a smart bunch) have already taken into account your SHIT DRIVING SKILLS!?!?
So stop driving SO FUCKING SLOW!!!!
But let me add to the rhetoric of why you are a DUMB ASS if you drive too slowly….
This from the Victorian driving test serious errors section:
“If the traffic is very busy and moving at a speed slower than the speed limit, you should choose an appropriate speed to fit into the traffic flow. However you may be penalised if you drive too slowly for the conditions during the test because you are meant to be driving in normal, day-to-day driving conditions.”
“YOU MAY BE PENALISED IF YOU DRIVE TOO SLOWLY!!!!”
Oh and while I’m on this topic of shit driver’s. Which part of “KEEP LEFT UNLESS OVERTAKING” don’t you get. It is so difficult a concept that it takes FOUR FUCKING WORDS to explain it!!!!
FOUR FUCKING WORDS!!!!
And you can get fined for it, DICKHEADS!!!!
So next time you are on the roads, just try to work on two simple things that piss off a heap of people….
DO THE FUCKING SPEED LIMIT!!!!
AND KEEP FUCKING LEFT!!!!
Otherwise, take your driver’s license out of your wallet, purse, manbag,or whatever and….
SHOVE IT SO FAR UP YOUR ARSE THAT